The Great Hurdle of Perfectionism

Added on by Jeremy Mulder.

It's hard to blog when you are a perfectionist. If you have been afflicted with this God-awful disability, you know the problems associated with it. One of the challenges is the inability to get started on something if you know it's not going to be done right.

The advice on blogging (still have to find the article again and link to it) was to just start writing; don't be concerned with grammatical error or with the perfect sentences or saying everything in the best possible way. Just start writing. Write, write, write. Perfectionism stands in the way of doing just that, however. "Just get started, don't worry about the outcome" is not a tool of the perfectionists trade.

The perfections wants to figure out the best thing to blog on; the best topic to write about. They want to reserve their words for something truly worth expounding upon. Then, when that thing comes to mind, and that moment is there, they want to delicately massage out the words so that they say exactly what they want to say, without there being hardly a trace of potential that someone may misinterpret what they said. Since this is nigh impossible, the perfectionist then is continually frustrated with their efforts–someone misunderstands what they have said, and so the perfectionist internalizes and promises to not make the same mistake the next time. 

The next day, the blog takes a little longer to develop; there is more at stake this time around. The perfectionist has already failed to meet his or her goal once, and they cannot have it happen again.

It doesn't take long for those piles of fails to build up so that beginning to even write at all is perceived as a chore too great to undertake. The outcome can't possibly live up to the hope. And in the face of this flies the advice, "just start writing". Just put something down on paper. Just go for it.

Case in point, I've already edited this very post. Of course there is the occasional deletion of a sentence that failed to formulate in a cohesive manner or the deletion of a word that was tragically misspelled so that even the brain in the computer couldn't decipher what was intended to be said, but this is something different. This is going back and correcting the "to's" and "too's", or the "your" and "you're"'s because you want to make sure that no one might assume that you don't know the difference; the assumption is that no one would have the grace to realize that, since you are just writing, occasionally the signals from your brain to your fingers as you type might get crisscrossed with the unintended consequence being that when your brain says "you're" you type "your". But there is no room for that type of imperfection in the life of the perfectionist.

And then there is the issue of time. The perfectionist wants the perfect moment. The thing that may have stood in the way of me blogging today was the fact that I believed that a more opportune time would present itself, whether because of the pace or schedule of the day or because a topic might arise that inspired me more than the one at hand. Typically the perfectionist waits for that moment, like a surfer passing on 15 good waves for the one wave that blows them away. If a surfer were to do that, I can't help but think that there are many sunny days he would simply be floating in the water, before the sun goes down again, and he goes home having never actually surfed.

So it is with the writer who doesn't capture the moment that he has, right as it comes, as the opportunity to put thoughts to paper unfolds and he takes the chance, no matter how far short of perfect it may be, no matter how imperfect the content or the writing or the whatever-else-might-matter may be, but instead just says, "I'll do it." And he writes.